Friday, March 2, 2012
Root Canal of the Soul
At my last cleaning, her touch was so tender, so gentle. She told me I had beautiful teeth. She told me I had beautiful gums. When a dentist says that, it means something, right?
Then she pressed something horrible against my teeth and it made a beeping sound.
I had cavities.
But she told me it wasn't my fault. She said I had "deep grooves." She didn't blame me. She knew where I came from, and believed in where I was going (--> the drilling station).
Then the creepy dental hygienist came in and said, "I want your teeth. Can we take them out and put them in my mouth?" GAH!
But I digress. How can I have beautiful teeth if they are also blackened, rotting, and spotted with decay? When I got my cavities filled, my mouth was numb and I was feeling vulnerable. And did my dentist support me for better or for worse? Did she tell me she'd always love me in sickness and in health? No! That unfeeling woman turned on me like a wolf and said, "Have you ever had braces?"
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Does that mean my teeth are hideously crooked? Is she afraid to be seen with me in public? And why was she wearing that mask the entire time? Maybe she herself has no teeth. I mean, can you ever really know a person?
It was a trying experience. I felt so yanked around. So used. Did she just want me for my teeth? And were my teeth...enough? I have to get my wisdom teeth out at the end of the month (punch me in the face); will she love me when I have four fewer teeth?